|Opinions & Notions.||
Last night, my friends and I decided to go downtown to have some fun on Thirsty Thursday. I volunteered as designated driver so of course I wasn't going out to get plastered. Sober, I had an awesome night- met new friends, danced my ass off and had a great time. However, since it IS downtown Springfield there of course had to be some type of drama. A girl, who I know through mutual friends (well, at one time they were friends), was downtown last night. Lindsey and I was standing near the table she was sitting at. I was not even paying attention and was too busy dancing so I'm not 100% sure what happened but the next thing I know Travis (a mutual friend) is standing inbetween Lindsey and this girl, talking to Lindsey. They weren't going to fight but clearly something was going on. We walked away but apparently she had a few words to say about me on Facebook (Not even to my face). So before I show you what was said, let me tell you a little about myself, for those of you who dont know me well....
My name is Amy Adelman. I am twenty-one years old as of June 22. I have two babies, Harper Grace and Caden Mathew, who are my world. Caden Mathew was born October 8, 2008. I was 17 years old. Harper Grace was born February 16, 2012. I was 20 years old. I work for Wells Fargo in a position that I am very fortunate to have. I make over 31K yearly, not including working overtime. When I was 18, I had a full ride scholarship to Robert Morris College that I gave up for my son so I could work full time. This year will be my first time attending college, part time at Lincoln Land Community College. Now, I will be raising two kids, attending college and working 48+ hours a week.
I was in a very serious relationship for six years with Bryan Friedrich. He was my first and only, if you get my drift. He is the father of both of my children. We started dating when I was 15 years old. We had a LOT of issues in our relationship but still worked through them the best we could. We were due to get married in May 2011. Because we had more growing up to do, the wedding was canceled in April. Shortly after, we found out I was 11 weeks pregnant. For a brief time, we tried to work on things but clearly still had our differences. We both agreed we needed time apart. We decided we needed to do what was best for our kids and went our seperate ways. Since then, I have been on my own raising our two children.
Being a single mom, let alone a young mom, is NOT an easy task. My days consist of: waking up at the crack of dawn, feeding Harper, getting the kids ready for school, taking them to daycare, going to work 8:00-5:00, picking them up from daycare, making dinner for Caden and I, feeding Harper, playing with Caden or watching Team Umizoomie, reading a book to Caden before bed, feeding harper, showering, going to bed and throughout the night feeding Harper. This is my schedule every day Monday through Friday. Saturdays I work overtime and spend time with the kids doing whatever, while cleaning. Every other weekend, the kids go to their dads house and stay there. On those weekends, I spend time with my friends doing whatever they want to do. Typically, we go downtown to dance or hangout at my house.
I am very outspoken, honest and friendly. I get along with nearly everyone. If you are nice to me, I am nice in return. I do not filter what I say, I never have and never will. I dislike when people are dishonest with me so I do my best to be as honest as I can be. I have trust issues due to a brutal past. I have many male friends, none of whom I've had any desire to be with. I have very few close friends and I consider them my "clique": Lindsey, Bri, Kiki, Brit, Amber and Alex.
If you think this looks like jibberish, you're absolutely right. When I read this, I literally felt my IQ drop 10 points, good gracious. Lets break this down:
1. "Idc if you dislike me and want me to pay"- I am assuming she is talking about this issue she had with her previous mutual friends. She receieved a ticket to a camping trip with my friends, they got in an argument before it, she demanded her money back for the ticket, they told her she can have her ticket, long story short.... SHIT'S OVER and has been over for a LONNNNG time, move the fuck on.
2. "but the minute you and...." She's referring to Lindsey...
3. "... your day ugly white trash had 2 babies before 21" LMAO. I'm not sure what she was going for with "day ugly" maybe gay? Which if that is the word, clearly I am not gay if I have two babies; and "White trash"... ahhh. White Trash: pejorative term referring to a poor white person in the United States. Sweetheart, I make more money now than you have in your whole 4 years of working combined. Needless to say I'm clearly not a "poor white person", can we sound a little more intelligent please?
4. "had 2 babies before 21" Why yes I did. Which apparently made me grow up and made me much more maturer than you have ever been in your whole pathetic life. They are the main reason why I am the way I am now. Unlike most girls my age, I think about someone else before myself. I am not jumping from man to man. I am not "sleeping around". I can hold a relationship and avoid idiots such as yourself as much as possible.
5. "Friends try to touch my friends" Either you're crazy or you're crazy. No one was "touching your friends". No one even touched you, get a frickin life.
6. "It's game on" What are you going to do? Seriously. You're so tough behind your phone typing a Facebook status but you can't say anything straight to my face? HA. Grow a few inches, be a big girl and lets play this "game". We're adults now and as much as you claim you "hate" drama YOU STARTED IT but trust me when I say this I WILL finish it.
So there you have it. Clearly, this idiot has NO clue what the hell she is talking about. I've wasted my time long enough on this subject. Believe me when I say this, next time she has something to say, she will either say it to my face or find out what truly happens when you run your mouth about me. I have better things to worry about than a jealous female who isnt making much of her life. NEXT.
This is going to be a shorter blog basically because.... well it's Friday and I have shit to do. However, I do want to say thank you to everyone who has been reading these and I really do appreciate it! So thank you! Rant over...
I think we all know a friend who has dated someone who was no good for them or maybe we were the one who dated that person. Either way, people make decisions that aren't always the correct decision to choose. Why do men date women who lack a genuine personality? Who do women date men who treat them like they're garbage but they're "meant to be"? This clouded judgement is called the Halo Effect. The Halo Effect is a judgement about a person based on looks that clouds into judgements about their specific traits. Our first initial judgement of others can alter are perception. In other words, we often see only what we want to see.
Example: Earlier today I showed fifteen people two pictures. The first picture was an adorable beagle puppy. I described the puppy as an 8 week old female who was not obedient and not potty trained. I then showed a picture of a beagle puppy not as adoarble as the first one. The description on this puppy was an 8 week old female who was obedient and potty trained. I then asked: Honestly, which puppy would you choose? 12 out of 15 people picked the first puppy, including myself. Even though the most logical choice should be puppy number two, we choose number one because it "looks cute".
Another example that comes to mind is when I've met someone famous. I have met many musicians who turn out to be the complete opposite as to what I imagined. Chris Young is a perfect example of how the halo effect works. Before I met Chris Young, I assumed he was sweet, funny and down-to-earth based solely on his music and looks. After I met him, my opinion completely changed. He was rude and self-centered, not how I pictured him at all. Still sexy though lol. Thats why stars and musicians are perfect examples of the Halo Effect; because they are often attractive and likeable we naturally assume they are also intelligent and friendly.
I think this is a fascinating study and it's definitely something you should be aware of. The next time you go on a date ask yourself is the Halo Effect being used here? Do you know anyone who has ever been clouded because of the Halo Effect?
"I just want to be friends." "I'm not ready to date." "You're a nice guy and someday you're going to make some girl feel very special." "It's not you, it's me." You've heard all of our lines, haven't you? Yet, you keep throwing yourself at us like you're a piece of meat; hoping that someone actually will catch you and realize your worth. You're tired of being that "Nice" guy. The guy that gets left in the friendzone. The guy that we turn to when another douchebag comes along and hurts our feelings again. And again. And again. Well... Luckily I'm here to help you take the saying "Nice guys finish last" and put it in your past (catchy, eh?).
First, let me define the positives of the "Nice Guy": A nice guy goes out of his way for others. He is sweet, kind and very genuine. He gives emotional support. He is not controlling. He avoids confrontation, fights and arguments. He does favors for others. He opens doors, pulls out chairs and lends his jacket when you're cold. Nice guys are typically sensitive, emotional and committed.
I'm sure many woman are reading this thinking "Ha! Where is HE at?!"..... He's in the friendzone... where you left him... when you went chasing after whatshisname who turned out to be a prick. Now, I'm not saying you're wrong for leaving him there. There are downfalls to the "Nice Guy". For example: He is BORING.
Nice guys tend to be too clingy and desperate. They lack the ability to take control over any situation. They typically are followers; overerly possessive. Often, they are weak and have low self esteem. They blow up our phone with text message after text message. They smother us to the point where we feel we can't breathe or even think.
Now that I have your attention. Are you tired of being the go-to guy when she's had a bad date? The shoulder to cry on? The guy that feels like he wants her to need him? Tired of waiting around for her to come around? Here's my suggestion: Take control of your own life.
No woman ever wants to have all of the power in a relationship. We want a manly man. We want a man that will debate with us if we are talking about something you dont agree with. We dont want a pushover. We want a man that isnt afraid to grab the bull by the horns. We want a man who will take us to places we've never been. Isn't afraid to try different things. We should never feel like we have to take care of you. We want to feel protected, secure and stands up for what is his. We dont want a man that feels like he Needs us, we just want a man to want us.
So there you have it. If you can create a balance of Nice guy and Manly Man then you will be the Perfect man. So what are your thoughts? Do you think nice guys finish last?
At some point in your life, for maybe one brief minute... you believed you would find your prince charming. He would ride up on his white steed, take you into his masculin arms and the two of you would ride off into the sunset, bound for Happily ever after... Well let's be honest: Your prince turned out to be a nerd and the only thing he picks up is a controller or a remote, bound for another night of Call of Duty, ESPN or another rerun of CSI.
Every night does not have to always resort to "What do you want to do?" and "I don't know. What do YOU want to do". Back and fourth. Over and over. It gets old. Luckily for you, I have created: Five Date Night Ideas You Should Try at Least Once. Read on for some inspiration...
Date night 1: Remember wayyyyy back when there used to be these things called board games that people would sit around and play, rather than sit on their Iphone? Apparently those are still around. So sit down and grab out the old Trivial Pursuit, Twister or, my favorite, Scrabble board game. Don't have them still? Stop by your local Walmart, there's an aisle dedicated to games (Yup, it is not located by the xbox games so no need to stop there) and you'll probably find a new one you will want to play.
Date night 2: Get festive and bring out your inner cocinero! Help one another make fajitas, sit back and relax with a bowl of chips and salsa, watch The Legend of Zorro or Desperado. This is a great way to have fun making dinner while saving money by not going out to eat.
Date night 3: For all of you couch potatoes, get your ass out of the chair! Being outdoors has a lot to offer. One of my favorite things to do? Exercise. No, that does not necessarily mean go to the gym and lift weights. I have found it very fun to just walk. Springfield has a 8+ mile trail that runs to Chatham which has amazing scenery all around! If you're newly dating someone, walking or even biking this trail would be a great way to get to know your spouse. Not only will you be saving money, you'll be burning off that calorific McDonald's you splurged on (No calorific is not a word and yes you may now use it). If you plan on making this an all day event, don't forget to pack a lunch. Want to make it romantic? Pack a picnic for the two of you and don't forget the wine!
Date night 4: Get up early or stay up all night to watch the sunrise. Grab a blanket, crank up the radio and drive out into the country. Grab some flashlights and head out into the corn for some fun flashlight tag. Dance under the stars. Who knows what you could do while you're waiting...
Date night 5: Hit up a local park. Go to Washington Park and feed the ducks. Walk your dog together at Stuart Park. Play one on one tennis at Lincoln Park. Bring chalk and decorate the sidewalk with all your amazing art at Southwind Park. Just be you and have fun.
So there you have it!! A date night for every day of the work week. Haha. So tell me, what did you do on your first date? What was the best date you've ever been on?
Its that time of year again in good ol' Springfield-- The Illinois state fair is back. I can't think of a better way to drop hundreds of dollars, gain forty pounds in a week and freak.. Err... I mean people watch. Which is why I'm dedicating today's blog: The Top 3 Likes and Dislikes of the State Fair. Hope you enjoy! ;)
Like 1: The state fair parade has always been a tradition in my family. Every year, my whole family would gather at my grandmothers house to watch the parade. As kids, my cousins and I would snatch up candy then make our way down to the fairgrounds to ride some rides, watch fireworks and eat. For the past three years, I have been able to share this experience with baby angel número uno, Caden Mathew. This year Harper was able to enjoy the loud sirens, music and people walking by.
Like 2: Food, food and more food. Who wouldn't enjoy a large amount of delicious calories? The fair offers an awesome variety of food, from jumbo corndogs to fried twinkies. I am always willing to drop nearly ten dollars on my favorite fair food, pork kabobs. Even though it's expensive, it sure is worth it.
Like 3: The state fair offers a variety of rides for kids of all ages. For the past two years, I have been able to watch Caden enjoy rides. From motorcycles to bumper cars, there is never a dull moment watching a three year old having a blast. Brings up childhood memories.
Which brings me to my favorite subject-- my top three dislikes about the fair. Honestly, I could talk all day about what I dislike; but I will just leave you with these three thoughts to consider next time you go out to the fair.
Dislike 1: Clothing is not optional, and when they say put SOMETHING on, that usually means clothes that fit. Just saying...
When has it EVER been fashionably acceptable for a larger woman to wear leggings as pants? Never. Ever ever ever. My children do not want to see every curve of your gloriousness. If I wanted them to see a freakshow, I would take them to a circus.
Dislike 2: Not once has "Hey! I have an idea! Let's go out to the fair to fight someone, that away we can make fools of ourselves and get thrown out!" ever popped up in my mind. Leave the drama at home. Please.
Dislike 3: I don't know how many times I've walked by someone and thought to myself, "Dear sweet baby Jesus! Do you bathe yourself in dog shit?". Personal hygiene should NEVER be an issue; you should know you have an issue if I can smell your musty armpits over the smell of any food out at the fairground. That is just disgusting. Go home, shower, then return to whatever chaos you were creating.
So there you have it! My top three likes and dislikes about the Illinois State Fair. So what are your top three likes? Top three Dislikes?
I seriously cannot believe that the day has come where technology has overridden my life. It seems like every ten minutes I have to check my phone for a text message, see my friends "tweet" or check Facebook to see if anyone has updated their status'. It's really pathetic.
I've never really been one who can sit for hours on end in front of a tv; however, stick a phone in my hand and I will be amused for days. It's not even like I'm making phone calls. I play games such as SongPop and Draw Something. I sit for hours on Twitter tweeting absolutely nothing important. Oh, let's not forget my newest addiction- Pinterest.
Now don't get me wrong, I love pinterest. Along with every other female out there. For those who dont know what Pinterest is: pinterest is a social site that allows its users to share pinboard-style photos with themes such as hobbies, foods, interests and do it yourself ideas.
If it wasn't for pinterest I wouldn't have made these adorable butterfly memorabilias. However, I would also get a lot more work done at work. I get so distracted by pinterest that my typical work day flow has dropped tremendously and it's all my own fault. I feel like I should go to a rehab center and say, "My name is Amy Adelman and I am addicted to Pinterest.". At least the first step would be out of the way, try to take my phone away however and I'll bite your arm off.
Soooo.... What's your thoughts?! Is it possible to be too addicted to technology? Or even pinning crafty projects or food ideas?